Tuesday, February 21, 2006

"Old Guard" Still Favored to Medal - Undefeated Get Dissmissed

I just hope I get my thoughts in on time about the men's Olympic medal round. It's funny to see the panic in the voices and opinions of the sports media elite. They still have their collective heads up their "you know what" or in the sand. The media elites will still refuse to acknowledge that Canada and USA are not favored to win the gold medal this year. "It's only the prelims. It doesn't count", they tell me. That's a Bode Miller-type excuse. Well, barely making it to the medal round should stand for something! Clearly, you can't be gold medal confident after back to back games getting bitch slapped by the Swiss (who I thought were supposed to be neutral) and Team Selanne.

And I was planning on a long-winded post about how disrespectful the Team Canada women were to run up the score on Italy and Russia (12-0 and 16-0). Shame on those girls who just should have known better and shame on them for a sorry ass excuse to try and justify their poor sportsmanship. "It's not our fault they suck!" is absolutely horrendous and a slap in the face to their competition.

Don't even get me started about about my home country USA's pathetic existence of a hockey program. I'm going to be twice as hard on them as I just was with the "old guard". (See predictions at bottom)

It seems as if Peter Laviolette either got pushed around or is a part of the hockey world that lives in the past. He put a team together that includes a USA hockey generation that should be sent to pasture instead of promoting the youth. Old and tired roster spots like Modano, Hatcher, Schnider, and the grandaddy himself - Chris Chellios have no business being in Turin. I'm sorry, but it's true. Did you see the way the "crafty old veteran" Chellios hit the ice in the game against Slovakia when he felt a stick at his legs? Damn! Do Wings and Avs fans have to put up with that bull shit on a daily basis?

Did you see the section in the NY Times about how one cub reporter assesses that Team Finland is actually what the doctor ordered for Team USA in the first medal round?

Team Finland plays a great team effort where Team North America just consider themselves as champions by birthright. Teemu Selanne has averaged a goal a game in the Olympics, go undefeated in preliminaries, and still they get disrespect by the media elites.

Same things goes for the Slovaks. You don't hear anything about them! They should be the favorites to be in the Feb 26th game. They go undefeated and win 1st place in their pool after historically winning very little in the past.

The new guard is here, folks. The playing field is leveled. Deal with it.

First Medal Round Predictions

  • Team USA vs Team Finland
    I should warn my countrymen to hold on to their collective nads (or what's left of them already), because they're about to meet up with Jarkku "opportunistic hitter" Ruutu and Team Finland for a severe lesson in how to castrate. Team Finland sees blood in the water and will frustrate Team USA with their 4 man blueline trap. Antero Niittymaki is in his AHL MVP form. Expect the geriatric Americans to quit mid-second period and get blown out.

    Prediction: Finland 7 USA 0

  • Team Canada vs Team Russia
    This is the most evenly matched up game of the 4. Russia has been quietly making a strong case for the medal podium with "Kovalchick" and "Oven Chicken" doing most of the scoring. Team Canada better pray for rain in the form of Spezza getting out of the taxi and on to the scorecard. Look for a revamp of lines from Coach Pat Quinn to generate some offense.

    Prediction: Canada 5 Russia 3


  • Team Switzerland vs Team Meatball (Sweden)
    Not even ABBA is a safe enough reference in a game that should highlight all major exports of the Swiss and Swedes. You can set your Swiss watch to how much time is left on Martin Gerber's 15 minutes of fame. A hot goalie can carry a team far in a tournament. It's time for the Swedish chef to whip up a recipe on how Henrik Lundqvist's going to stay in the "Calder Trophy" pot. Peter "Olympic diving" Forsberg will surely do a half gainer over your stick if the Swiss place theirs in front of him.

    Prediction Sweden 5 Swiss 1


  • Team Slovakia vs Team Czech Republic

  • It's time to cowboy up now that Slovakia has opened some eyes as to the strength of their team. They now have to prove themselves to their "capitalist older brothers" in the Czech Republic to gain a lasting respect and recognition that they have arrived as a serious hockey program. Jagr's bump on the head may affect his NHL days and will turn into a story for sure. Will he get amnesia and remember himself as the sad sack Capitals version? The Slovak blueline is a wall with the two trees Jurcina and Chara. Plus, the Slovaks top line of Demitra, Bondra, and Gaborik are running on all cylinders.

    Prediction: Slovakia 3 Czech Republic 2 (shootout)
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